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Unreasonable people make good reasons to reconsider my judgment.
We've all had to deal with them. Those stubborn unreasonables. Damn them, why oh why can't they just see! Why don't they get it. For crying out loud it's so easy to see. Everyone else can, why can't they?! Well if they don't understand that maybe they'll get this #$%^&*.
Who's unreasonable here?
Unreasonable people really only matter to us when we want something they are unwilling to provide.
Consider for a moment that the idea of being unreasonable is in-fact just not possible - that absolutely no one can be unreasonable, that there is always a reason even if we can not see it nor understand or comprehend. If it is true that there is always a reason, even if we do not know what that reason is, then all people are reasonable but not necessarily aware.
In common usage being unreasonable has negative connotations and more often than not it is someone else who is being unreasonable not me! Clearly, if I think that you are unreasonable I can see reasons you cannot.
What is important here is not that 'you' are unreasonable, what's important here is that 'I think' you are unreasonable. The idea that I have pigeon holed you as unreasonable provides me with all sorts of reasons for my actions. Think about it. How do I choose to move forward from the point of interacting with people who I believe are unreasonable? Often the outcome and importantly the path to that outcome, when framed within the idea that you are unreasonable, will be fraught with tension and conflict. It exists as soon I have the thought that you are unreasonable, that I am reasonable and you are not.
If however, there is always a reason then I might want to reconsider my judgment.
When faced with people I judge as unreasonable what I'm really saying is that I either don't know their reason(s) or I do not believe their reason(s) or I want them to accept my reasons and replace their own reasons with mine or they are unable to reason. In this view your unreasonableness is my creation formed out of my beliefs and my reasons. If I can construct reasons for having you be unreasonable, I can also construct reasons that hold you to not be unreasonable. I get to cast you in a role that either helps me or hinders me (and you). Do I help myself when I cast you as unreasonable or 'not unreasonable'?
If I cast you as unreasonable I set up a large obstacle for me to overcome because there is no reasoning with you. Remember, unreasonable people matter to us when we want something they are unwilling to provide. On the other hand if I cast you as not unreasonable I create the potential to reason with you and the possibility of your support.
People will do what they do.
I may not know nor understand or agree with their reasons. Question is, "What do really I want?" What is my goal? What am I aiming for? Am I empowering myself and those around me or not? In this respect unreasonable people make good reasons to reconsider my judgment.
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